So welcome back.
So, as you thought about Cecilia,
the management consultant's challenge,
did you come up with any ideas about things that you
might say and do if you were in those circumstances?
And perhaps more to the point,
thinking about the personality of Cecilia as we described it, you know,
she was more of a dialogue kind of person rather than a confrontational debating,
argumentative kind of person,
did you come up with a script and action plan that might work for her?
Well let me tell you what she actually did.
So, Cecelia told the story,
tells me the story and she says in that moment when
this senior manager had been so agitated,
her first reaction was to pull back – she was somewhat fearful – but then
she took a minute and she paused and she was trying basically to buy time,
but she was also being more true to herself and so she
asked a question rather than trying to argue with him.
And she said, "So,
when you hired this individual and then you had to let him go,
you said you paid a price.
What price did you pay in the organization?"
And she really wanted to know.
It was a genuine question.
But the manager's response really surprised her and took her aback.
He had been leaning forward,
he'd been agitated, and when she asked that question,
his whole body kind of relaxed and his face loosened up and he leaned back in
his chair and he tilted his head and sort of smiled a little quizzically and he said,
"You know, I've been telling that story for a couple of years now ever since
this happened and no one has ever asked me what price I paid before.
They always listen to my story and nod understandingly and assume I paid a price."
And he said, "But now that you ask the question,
I realize I didn't pay a price,
but you know I really thought I had."
So, Cecilia was kind of surprised at this response and,
you know, her first reaction in her head was to think "gotcha!"
You know, that she'd caught him.
But then she realized he hadn't been dissembling,
he hadn't been trying to fool her or deceive her,
he really believed he'd paid a price.
And so she realized that,
you know, the price he'd paid, if any at all,
was really just one he'd imagined or maybe one that he had exacted from himself.
And so, when she asked that question in a
non-confrontational and in a learning stance
where she really wanted to hear what he had to say,
she wasn't trying to argue with him that he was wrong,
that became the basis for them to finally have a real conversation and to start
connecting about what the challenges might truly
be in the organization and how they might address them.
And so, what Cecilia learned from this is that knowing who she was,
knowing what her strengths were,
but also her preferred communication style,
the way she was most effective enabled her to
actually find a way rather than believing that being the kind of person I am,
I can never address these issues,
she realized I just need to find a way to frame the challenge that plays to my strengths,
and that's what she did in this circumstance.
So I'm curious, was your response for Cecilia anything near what she actually did?
Does it surprise you what she did and how it worked out?
And also reflect upon yourself.
Have you ever had a similar kind of experience
where you were surprised at the positive impact that you had?